Friday, March 9, 2012

“An Ode To Beer”

Beer is the greatest drink
It makes me not want to think
It makes me feel invincible
While it makes ugly invisible
It makes white people dance
And gives perverts cheap romance
It makes a shy guy grow balls
And students puke in the halls
So, just give me a pint of Bass
Sorry, Corona tastes like ass
Guinness is also good for you
Until the tenth pint makes you spew
So drink some beer with your friends
Drink it until the keg meets its end
Drink until you can’t keep it down
Trust me, it’s fun to stumble around
Drink until your head feels light
Just don’t screw around that night
You may wake up naked and sore
Sleeping next to a transvestite whore
So chug down a 40 of malted liquor
Chug it so you can get drunk quicker
Chug down those bottles and cans
And for once, feel like a real man
So quit drinking that Zima you queer
And chug down a pint of a real beer
Learn the true joys of barley and hops
And drink that lager till your ass drops

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