"World War 3 – The Day Of Mushrooms"

The day that the world came to an end
Went out and had fun with my best friends
We didn’t know that Earth would turn into Hell
Started out like any day as far as we could tell
We were sitting in a living room playing a game
Just having a good time calling each other names
A bright flash began to appear out of the east
A mighty rush of wind struck like a roaring beast
All the glass just shattered and the walls began to crack
Saw the mushroom cloud that follows a nuclear blast
The cloud was over Miami, which is now a smoking hole
We knew that World War III was beginning to unfold
Then, a bright flash from where Fort Lauderdale stood
Whatever comes out of this nuclear will not be good
I just stood there and watch the mushroom fill the sky
At the instant, deep in my heart, I was going to die
The last things I remember was being hit by the shock wave
After that, everything becomes blurred in a mental haze
The city was crumbling around me was my last memory
My last thought was Death is taking me out of my misery

"World War 3 - Prologue"

How it started the truth will never be told
The end of society marked by a loud blast
The death of a hundred million untold souls
Was quickly caused by a sudden, blinding flash
All we know was the United States was hit first
After that, we launched our nukes in retaliation
Entire countries were turned into piles of dirt
Nuclear winter has come finally to our nation
Those who survived have accepted their cruel fate
They begin to rebuild a city out of the destruction
Survival is the daily challenge that they must face
Water is the new monetary system for this nation
Those who control the drinking wells control the land
To question their authority is not the wisest move
They rule the barren wastelands with an iron hand
They will skin you alive and cook your bones in a stew
Accept it! This is the new way of life in the new America
The Constitution is no longer the laws that govern us
Chaos makes the laws and are enforced through paranoia
Those that quickly die make the biggest, loudest fuss
No longer the land of the free; it’s the land of survival
We fight everyday for the little we claim as our own
Government is dead; the anarchist killed all their rivals
All attempts to establish civilization have been overthrown
This is the state humanity has devolved into over the years
It’s truly an eye for an eye if you make the wrong move
The only driving force we have is living everyday is fear
For most, the hope of saving humanity gets us through
This is my morbid view of the new world that we live in
Yet, this is not my story that I lived through since 2005
I seen it all and have been through it all: thick and thin
Let me go back to where all the madness truly begins

Random Story Part 1

So, I was at the local park this afternoon. I was sitting on the bench when Ronald McDonalds walked over to me, and decked me in the jaw, causing me to land on the ground hard. I looked up at him, and saw him holding a bat. He gave me an angry look while screaming, "How could you?! You traitor!" Confused, I asked, "Do what?" He hit me in the ribs with the bat, and tossed down a few Whopper wrappers. "You traded me for that crazy king?" Before I could respond, I was whacked upside my head once more, causing me to black out.

09/23/12 Thoughts

I might have said this before, but if I did it's been so long ago. To me, a blog is really a place to flush the mind of random thoughts so you can focus, the literally equivalent of taking a really good shit. I've been doing this on other sites, but they limit you to a set amount of characters. This can be frustrating when you are used to not being limited by word counts or character limits. Despite Twitter and Facebook being popular, I still will keep a blog. I will tell you not to worry for I do limit myself on here. So, for fun and mental pooping, going to post pieces of a random story, and I mean random, here whenever I get stuck. 

Random Story - 09/17/12

Last night, the weirdest thing happened. I was eating a salad and drinking some tea, minding my own business at the dining room table. Out of the kitchen, I heard a voice scream out, "I'm putting an end to this madness!". I got up to look around, but no one was there. As I sat back down, I saw a bottle of Jack Daniels standing in my salad holding a cast iron skillet. The bottle smacks me upside the head, knocking me out cold. When I came too, I was being forced fed hot wings, fries, and cheese sticks by an army of Budweiser bottles. One of them now and then jumped into my mouth, screaming "For the glory of man!" before emptying their contents down my throat. About 50 wings and 24 or so bottles later, I woke up naked and under a very cold shower. I get dressed, and walk into the living room. On my couch, I found my buddy Samuel Adams holding an empty bottle of Jack Daniels. I looked at him and asked, "What in the world happened last night?" He smirked and replied, "We can't have you sitting home all night eating salad. So, we knocked you out, got you drunk, took out for beer and wings, and brought you home at 4am. Come on, man. How many good stories start out about eating a salad?" "True, but why did I imagine an army of Budweiser being led by a bottle of Jack Daniels?" "My guess is your mind was telling you that you really wanted to get drunk?"

07/23/12 Thoughts

Thoughts of the day:

Ever notice that in BBQ, it's the only time two dudes can talk about rubbing their meats, and it's considered normal conversation?

Also, when you're in the kitchen or playing billiards, you can comment on a woman's nice rack, and not get slapped?

That the only times a man should ever ask another man "Where's the wood?" is when using a smoker, starting a fire, using lumber, or at a hardware store.

That you can only say bitch freely when it involves dogs.

That you should only talk about crabs when dealing with seafood.

That shouting "Look at those hooters" is only acceptable when pointing towards a pair of owls.

That you should only say "What a nice pussy you have" to a woman if she's petting a cat.

“The Hole”

Falling ground ward violently fast
Landing with an earth-shattering blast
Within minutes, the crowds quickly amass
Gathering around the charred, blacken grass
The entire town came out of sheer curiosity
Many others came in the name of discovery
Whatever the reason they all wanted to see
What disturbed the early morning tranquility
What would cause such a huge commotion
That would put an entire town in motion
In the end, there was only one explanation
The fireball was caused by a gas main explosion
Sadly, that was not what happened on that day
Everyone gathered at the park overlooking the bay
What exactly happened none of the town will ever say
When asked, they all will tell you to quietly go away